In Flowers Lie Secret Codes

There have been a lot of flowers advertised lately, and it got me thinking about the time I spent as "the cute girl behind the counter" (official title. no, really) at a florist. I learned a lot, and not just about the names of flowers and the best way to keep them fresh. So here it is, no particular order:

Don't order the most popular flowers on a big holiday. I know, you're supposed to give red roses on Valentine's, but trust me on this one. In some cases, red roses are stockpiled for MONTHS to save up for Valentine's Day. Think about that. Flowers. Sitting wrapped up very very tightly for months until they're used in that special arrangement for your beloved. Sometimes we'd unwrap a package that happened to be a little damp when it got wrapped, and those flowers would be moldy. The solution: get other kinds of flowers. Ask the florist to do a mixed arrangement, or choose something like tulips. Tulips are great in spring, and people don't often request them for Valentine's Day. Get the red roses on a different day.

There are MANY colors and types of roses. Check 'em out. Some have one main color with a different color just barely painted around the petal tips. Some look paint splattered. Some are coral colored, light silvery purple, or even green. Yes, green. Some are really thick, as though they have twice as many petals as the usual ones. These make really fat, gorgeous blossoms. Ask if they have anything cool or unusual that they've been dying to use in an arrangement.

You've probably heard of the "language of flowers" - you know, red roses mean passionate love, while yellow roses mean the decrease of love. Jasmine means sensuality, while lavender means mistrust. And who can forget Ophelia's "There's rosemary, that's for remembrance. Pray you, love, remember. And there is pansies, that's for thoughts...."? Well, that's how the Victorian's did it, anyway. But you can make up your own language. We had a couple that would order flowers from time to time, and according to them, a bouquet of Anthurium and Pussywillow meant to prepare for a long night of loving ahead. Every time we got an order from one of them, it charged up the whole flower shop, and got us all thinking about snuggling someone. You may be sending flowers to your sweetheart, but the gift radiates out, and keeps on giving.

Think about it.

Water kept in a vase of flowers for a week or more smells FOUL. Even worse than Baby's A$$. To keep this from stinking up your house, dump out the water in the vase and refill it from the tap every few days. Use a bit of the flower food each time if you want, but it's not necessary.

Baby's Breath is nicknamed Baby's A$$ by those in the floral industry. It does not small pretty. Think about what every woman does when she's handed a flower: she sniffs it. Say no to Baby's Breath. (On the other hand, it's really cool when you first put it in the vase - all the little buds pop open like wee popcorn.) There are lovely alternatives: genistra, heather, waxflower (prettier than it sounds), and caspia to name a few.

And the last tip for today: Ladies, you can give flowers as well. Yes, to men. Some of them even really like it. A lot. There are even arrangements designed especially for men, if you think your guy may not go for the frilly pink stuff.

That's all I have for now. Feel free to share if you have any flower tips, stories, or interesting facts.

And to the Mothers (and Mothers-to-be, Viv!):

Happy Mother's Day!!